NYC Real(i)ty Speak: Renovation lies we have known

By Veronica X. | October 7, 2011 - 1:19PM

Your dream bathroom/kitchen/apartment is about to become a reality....Or is it? The dream plans are in all-too-human hands now...

"The tiles will look straight when they are grouted." = The tiles are crooked.
"We needed more tiles than we expected." = We broke a lot of tiles.
"They didn't have everything you wanted in polished chrome. We had to order nickel." - The nickel is more expensive and I get 20% on top.
"There was an unexpected condition." = My original estimate was off by 30%.
"We are on schedule and will be done by Thanksgiving." = Plan to eat your turkey somewhere other than your dining room.

Veronica X. is a Canadian by birth, an Upper West Sider by nature, and an Upper East Siderby choice and circumstance. She has finally found an apartment big enough for her family, books, and shoes and is now in the process of renovating it.

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