NYC Real(i)ty Speak: Out of the mouths of babes

By Veronica X. | January 6, 2011 - 4:05PM

You hope that your children don't really notice the difference between ten rooms on Park Ave or four flights up on Columbus, but they do. For the only honest real estate appraisal in Gotham, leave it to the kids...

In the lobby: "Wow!!! I can hear my echo... echo... echo..." Sally is used to 'narrow and linoleum', not 'wide and marble.'
In the hallway: "What's that funny smell?" On the plus side, Junior is clearly not yet partaking in 'Reefer Madness'.
In the elevator: "Look, you can sit down! What is that man doing in here?" Jane is very impressed with the plush seating; not so much with the fact that she can't push the button.
In the foyer: "Dude, this hallway is way small." Peter is introduced to the 'only two apartments per floor' concept.
In the apartment: "Where is the rest?" Mary will soon learn that the polite way to say this is, "Isn't this cozy?"
In the bathroom: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Those Japanese toilets just aren't for everyone.

Veronica X. is a Canadian by birth, an Upper West Sider by nature, and an Upper East Sider by choice and circumstance. She has finally found an apartment big enough for her family, books, and shoes and is now in the process of renovating it.

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