How not to be a real estate agent - The Sequel

• Tell the seller and family to take a hike during the showing. 
• Knowledge and due diligence earn repeat business and referrals more than being nice and waxing poetic about Bosch (whose models vary in quality).
• Find out if the building allows pets and what kind so that you don't drag buyers with a 50 lbs dog to a no-pets building. 
• Know what the pied-a-terre policy is, and what recent history of the board has and has not allowed; what the renovation policy is and how it is implemented; the specifics of any assessment.
• Take responsibility -- I have grown tired of hearing this at open houses: "I'm sitting in for the agent; sorry, I cannot answer all your questions. Write your mail address clearly and I am sure he/she will get back to you." 
• Know the number of units in contract in the building. (Don't lie about that number, especially when a mortgage approval depends on it.)
• Find out what the sublet policy is.

DON'T:

• Use photos of an entirely different building to advertise your listing.
• Stand over me at an open house like a salivating hound making sure I sign in. Don't follow me around step for step -- I want to be able to speak freely with my husband without you hanging onto every word.
• Tell me "There's nothing like that in your price range" when I am on the other end of the phone with a printout from StreetEasy that shows plenty of those in my price range. The MLS is not a closed system anymore. If you are too lazy to even take a look on the MLS for me, then you don't deserve my business. 
• Show listings that are 20% over the buyer's limit. (Do return e-mails after the buyer says they can't spend that much.) 
• Give me a picture of yourself as the congrats gift at closing. Seriously? (And when you're visiting to drop off paperwork, don't ask me why you don't see the picture of yourself anywhere.)
• Tell a buyer that their offer is an insult, then try to extract an offer that is 10% higher but the buyer refuses. When the apt sells a few months later for the price you considered "insulting" (at) least a mea culpa call would be nice. 
• Say everyone in NYC sells after 5 years, so it is crazy to plan beyond that.
• Tell a seller that nobody can predict taxes after the abatement runs out. There is an estimate in the Offering Plan; that is the number a buyer wants to know. 
• Continue to have open houses after the contract has been signed by both sides. 
• Tell a client that after the company takes 1/3 your boss takes 1/3 then you are left with what amounts to a minimum wage, so you don't have to address my questions.