Test Drive: giving a whirl to Tushy, the new clip-on bidet

The first time I ever saw a bidet was back in 1993 when staying at a home in Spain. My friends and I only used it to wash sand off of our feet and bathing suits upon return from the beach. Years later while traveling in India I was charmed with the hand-held faucets on all commodes. I had never felt cleaner and was sad to return home to my less advanced plumbing features.

And just last month a friend and I were at an open house of an $18 million apartment for sale in a tony Trump building, and when I went to use the restroom, I immediately became fascinated with a wall control panel for the toilet which featured six (!) bidet settings. I grabbed my friend and, like pre-teens, we tried each one, laughing hysterically when a gush of water from the bidet hit her squarely in the face. 

So when I saw an ad for Tushy, the cheekily-named portable bidet, I knew I had to have one. Addicted to Cottonelle flushable wipes for years, I realized if I could pull off the great bidet installation of 2015, my bathroom game would reach a new level. 

Still, I was wary. I live in a rental and have had bad experiences bringing in various other appliances on the sneak, like when I installed a Malber ventless washing machine-dryer combo into my Yorkville walkup years ago. (Yeah, that was me—things didn’t exactly go swimmingly, although they did get wet and rather wild.)

Not hot on causing more water damage to a rental, I researched Tushy thoroughly before giving it the old figurative flush. Turns out there are two models and both are fairly straightforward. One is a cold water-only version ($57) which has one hookup directly to the water line. So as long as your toilet has a standard tank, the instructions say it should be easy. The second is a bit more complicated, but still suitable to a rental as it makes no permanent changes to the toilet or pipes. The warm water version ($74) has two hookups so your toilet must be by your sink where the warm water pipes are usually housed. 

I opted for the least intrusive option: cold water. As I announced my upcoming endeavor to my Facebook friends I knew they would be sitting at the edge of their (toilet) seats waiting for the verdict. 

One friend who had already taken the plunge commented, “OMG, it will change your life. It ruins my day if I have to poop anywhere but home.”  She said her husband had installed the cold water version in less than 30  minutes. 

The Tushy tagline is simple: “For people who poop.” And there's a pretty succinct reason for why one should wash away any concern and just get the attachment already: “If a bird pooped on you, wouldn’t you wash with water? So why is your butt any different?”

Can’t really argue with that.

The site also points out that a post-bathroom wash can prevent UTIs and yeast infections; “New York City has spent more than $18M on sewage pipe cleanup from wet wipe blockages” it says; and wipes can actually dry out delicate genital skin. 

This was all sounding like a win-win.

I quickly ordered the cold water version. When it arrived less than a week later, I enlisted my building’s maintenance man to hook it up on the down low. While there is nothing specifically in my rental lease prohibiting me from adding an attachment to my toilet, and it doesn’t require electricity or any plumbing knowledge, I just felt safer not asking for permission.

Installation

My bidet came with extremely easy instructions—even though my guy didn’t want to read them and figured it was all self-explanatory—that required no special skill. The only tools needed that weren’t included were a wrench and screwdriver. I was squeamish about turning the water off myself even though I knew all I had to do was “righty-tighty.” The next step is to drain the toilet completely and then all that needed to happen was for the adaptor and tubing to be connected. 

Voila!

It took about 15 minutes in total and the scariest part was when my handyman tested the knobs and got sopping wet from the rogue spray. After the first try, the tube leaked a bit but once he tightened it all was fine and has remained like that since installed. 

Now, I was eager to try it out!

It has two knobs, one for pressure and one for either a dual (female) or single (male) stream. 

Verdict

I have used it after every bathroom visit since installed and have never been happier. It has made my bathroom game so much tighter. I have no need for wet wipes anymore so there is a huge cost savings. Further, I use far less toilet paper (eco-friendly!) only occasionally using a square or two to dry off. The cold-water version is perfect and it is, indeed, refreshing, as my friend said. Plus, if you want to skip the bidet feature, the toilet still functions as a traditional appliance as long as no knobs are turned. 

The only slight drawback is that the seat sometimes gets wet if not sitting on it perfectly centered. While online reviews said that the stream was sometimes not strong enough to do a thorough cleansing, that seems to depend on the particular building’s water pressure. Even on the lowest setting, I find the stream to be overly aggressive. 

It can also be dismantled, returning one’s toilet to its original non-fabulous state in mere minutes. But who would want that? If I ever move, my Tushy is coming with me. I never plan to be bidet-less again.

And if for some reason the Tushy isn't your thing, there are other brands of similar devices on the market, some cheaper (as low at $35 at Home Depot) so there is no reason for anyone not to be sitting pretty when nature calls. 

Now just for fun, here's SNL's hilarious take on a couple who are seriously into bidets. I kind of get them now.

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