Dear Ms. Demeanor,

Our beloved super is retiring after 25 years.  What is the proper etiquette in terms of giving him a warm send-off?  Do you have any gift or party tips for us?

Signed,

Farewell to Strong Arms
 
Dear Farewell,
 
How bittersweet! I absolutely love and applaud your instincts. The super is one of those people in the neighborhood (...in the neighborhood - sing it with me!) who can make or break city life.  
 
A gracious send-off is well-deserved for a man who does all home-related things you cannot or will not do. He is the guy you call when things go bump (or squeak) in the night, the one who unclogs a toilet or helps an ex- move out (similar job description, no?).
 
While a get-together in the lobby (for a larger building) or someone's apartment (in a smaller building) is lovely, it is not necessary.
 
Having everyone in the building sign a card of thanks and congratulations is a wonderful idea. People can chip in a minimum suggested amount or more towards a gift. Depending on your super, his interests, and his retirement plans, think watches, fishing or sporting equipement, iPad, gardening supplies, etc. Or simply present him with an always-appreciated cash bonus.
 
Retiring minds want to know,
Ms. Demeanor

Ms. Demeanor is channeled by a longtime Manhattan vertical dweller and real-estate voyeur who writes under the pen name Jamie Lauren Sutton. She is here to commiserate, calm and correct. Please email your quandaries to msdemeanor@brickunderground.com and put "Dear Ms. Demeanor" in the subject line.

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Ms. Demeanor's Sex, Laundry & Vertical Etiquette is written by etiquette columnist Jamie Lauren Sutton, a longtime Manhattan vertical dweller and real-estate voyeur

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